pexels-freestocksorg-987585

I Really Piss People Off

“Isn’t there a test you can give me that will tell me what kind of work I’ll be good at?” Working with clients is the most rewarding part of what I do, and I always work to make it a beneficial experience for all involved. Deeply understanding your strengths, values, skills, and vision for your life takes time and an openness to being vulnerable that can feel scary. It’s scary because to start this process means you are exposing old wounds, finding some you didn’t realize were there and giving them the ointment they need for healing. 

However, I know that sometimes the process can leave clients feeling frustrated; if it wasn’t hard we wouldn’t be getting anywhere.  Here are three things that can really piss off my clients:

There is no Test for the Perfect Job

“Can’t you just tell me what I should do?” 

My standard response is an admittedly snarky, “Sure, you can do anything and if you find the magic test, let me know.”

I get it: when we are feeling frustrated, down on ourselves and our circumstances and we know the systems that we are trying to navigate suck and are oppressive, we think “CAN’T SOMEONE JUST GIVE ME THE ANSWER!”! Unfortunately, true change doesn’t happen that way. Can I give you advice and a list of things I think you might be good at? Sure, but it’s not going to be the lasting change you came to me for.

Doing the deep work helps you to know when it’s time to recognize when things are working and when they aren’t. Knowing what needs a minor adjustment versus an entire change. 

There is no Clear Timetable

“How many sessions do I need?” 

Clients and potential clients get pissed off when I can’t promise them a specific timetable for when they will have all their questions answered. I wish I had a crystal ball to know when all of your life’s questions will be answered, but I don’t. What I can promise is that we will work together to define your goals and what progress and success mean to you. When we have an idea of what these mean, we can carve out a(n) (adjustable) timeline and then we will customize a plan to your specific needs and goals.

Too Many Answers  to “What Should I Do?”

My response to this question is, once again, admittedly snarky, “whatever you want” which isn’t helpful and usually makes people more pissed off! If you want a list of jobs that match a certain skill or trait, go here

Knowing what you’re good at doesn’t take into consideration all aspects of your life that might influence the kinds of jobs/work that align with you, and that matters.  If you don’t, you’ll likely continue these crappy patterns and feeling unsure/stuck about your life. Additionally, maybe you don’t want to get paid for the things you’re good at, maybe work supports the things you’re good at and want to do simply because they bring you joy. 

Taking the time to find this kind of clarity builds skills so that you can know when it’s time to make adjustments and changes in your life and job. Our lives change and circumstances shift and knowing how to know ourselves helps us make informed decisions with strength and compassion. The quick fixes feel good but don’t provide the lasting satisfaction we truly want.

As someone once said, “The truth will set you free, but first it’ll piss you off.”

I love helping people through this process so that they can live the life they envision. Schedule your free consultation today.